Marriage, Not Dating Episode 4 Recap

Sometimes sincere and honest words aren’t what others want to hear, even if it’s out of concern.


Episode 4: For Whom Do I Make Korean Pancakes For

Cold Open: Jang Mi pulls on Gi Tae’s tie (nope, sadly not for some sexy time) and hits him repeatedly. Aunt and a handful of other ladies try to stop her before she kills him. She throws him on the jesa (ancestor memorial) table.

4 Days Before The Incident

Jang Mi helps support Gi Tae out of his apartment to take him to the hospital. He insists that he’s okay, even though his face is as green as grass and he barely has the energy to stand. Jang Mi decides that he’s not okay and gives him a piggyback ride. Hahaha! Of course she does, she’s the best.

Se Ah shows up and Gi Tae quickly gets off of Jang Mi’s back. Ha! Se Ah asks what happened and Jang Mi tells her that Gi Tae fainted in the bathroom. Gi Tae continues to say that he’s fine but Jang Mi thinks that he must have hurt his head. Otherwise, what would explain his weird actions aka the hug. Jang Mi says that he must be mentally confused and that he’s not himself. Se Ah wants to take him to the hospital but Gi Tae says it’s ok; he’s a doctor after all. That earns him a smack from Jang Mi. She tells him Se Ah is also a doctor and that they need to go to the hospital, then she just carries him away on her back! Hahahaha!

On the drive to the hospital, Jang Mi sits in the back with Gi Tae and continues to fuss over him. She checks to see if he has a fever and then asks if he’s feeling dizzy and which part of the head he hit, all while forcibly moving his head back and forth. Someone’s acting like a real girlfriend and Se Ah takes notice.

At the hospital, the doctor confirms that Gi Tae didn’t hurt anything. Jang Mi then goes all “But why didn’t you tell me?” and Gi Tae reminds her that he told her numerous times that he was fine. She just chose not to listen. Gi Tae wants to pull out his IV but Se Ah stops him since he hasn’t eaten anything for 48 hours! I still can’t get over the fact that he was locked in the bathroom. Se Ah continues to say that if it weren’t for Jang Mi, he might have been stuck in the bathroom forever. It was also thanks to Jang Mi that she knew to show up at his apartment.

Gi Tae just complains that Jang Mi went and told rumors to everyone. He wants to leave but Jang Mi stops him, telling him to see his family first since they are almost at the hospital. Gi Tae wonders how they found out but Jang Mi tells him that she called grandma since she thought he was gravely injured. Se Ah is shocked to know that Jang Mi even knows his family. Gi Tae tells Se Ah that they’ve actually already met both families. He then says that she can leave now. Jang Mi thinks he’s talking to her and gets ready to leave but he holds onto her wrist, “You stay”.

He turns to Se Ah and thanks her before telling her to leave since it’s late. Se Ah complies, saying that she was about to leave anyways since she is tired and wants to rest. Once she gets to her car, her cool façade melts, she thinks back to Gi Tae and Jang Mi’s interaction at the hospital and how Gi Tae said that they’ve already met both families. She’s not very happy.

After Se Ah leaves, Jang Mi just glares at Gi Tae, who tries to avoid looking at her. Jang Mi says that Gi Tae is so childish, trying to make Se Ah jealous but Gi Tae says that it’s not like that. He tells her that if mom saw Se Ah things would get more complicated since she would like Se Ah a little tooooo much. That’s clearly not what he wants and Jang Mi understands.

Mom, aunt and grandma arrive and start fussing over Gi Tae. Mom just looks at Jang Mi and says that she sure surprises people frequently. Okay, mom needs to chillax, Jang Mi freaking saved her son. Aunt adds that it seems like they are always meeting in the emergency room for some reason and sarcastically says, “That is why they say the right person should become part of the family”. Jang mi apologizes but corrects aunt, telling her, “But I’m not part of your family yet.” Haha, did mention that I love this girl? Mom and aunt are stunned by her reply but Gi Tae just smiles.

Jang Mi tells Gi Tae that she’ll take her leave now that his family is there but he holds onto her again saying “Don’t go. Stay with me”. Gi Tae tells his family to leave since he has Jang Mi and needs to rest but aunt takes offense at the fact that they came to the hospital in the middle of the night just to be sent home again. Grandma wants to know what happened to him and how badly he is hurt. Gi Tae tells her that it’s severe, hes not sure what kind of symptoms he’s having but “when I don’t see Jang Mi, my heart feels like it is going to stop and when I do see Jang Mi, I can breath well”. Haha niiiiiice. Even mom rolls her eyes and Jang Mi tries to repress her gag reflex.

Grandma is relieved that Gi Tae is fine but aunt says he has a mental problem. Jang Mi tells them the real reason he’s in the hospital and Gi Tae lays it on thick saying that if it weren’t for Jang Mi, he would have died of starvation in the bathroom. He holds Jang Mi’s hand while saying all this. Mom seems to soften a bit and grandma is so thankful and mom has to drag her away. Aunt leaves but not before telling Jang Mi that she has her eyes on her.

As soon as they are gone, Jang Mi pulls her hand away just as Gi Tae lets go. LOL Jang Mi gives him a knock in the head and tells him to stop using her.

In the car, grandma defends Jang Mi and yells at her two daughters for accusing Jang Mi before knowing the whole situation. Aunt says that Jang Mi caused grandma to get drunk the last time but grandma just says that it’s because of that; she finally got a good night’s sleep and her complexion couldn’t be any better. Mom, the party-pooper, tells grandma that her face is just swollen and that she’ll make her some soup for it to go away. Poor grandma.

Grandma sardonically says that mom is always right and then tells her that she shouldn’t judge people so easily, from what she’s seen, Jang Mi is rather calm (ha!) and that she knows how to make jun (Korean pancakes) well. Aunt perks up at the mention of jun and says that being able to make it is a plus in the family. You know what they say, the way to a person’s heart is through their stomach! Mom just says that she needs to be a person who can benefit Gi Tae’s life. Ugh. Grandma says that Jang Mi gives Gi Tae motivation to live which should be good enough. Ha. Aunt says that Gi Tae sure seems to be head-over-heels for Jang Mi, so if they forcefully disagree, he might never see them again. Mom looks veerrry displeased and Aunt quickly shuts up. Grandma tells mom to get to know Jang Mi better and mom says she will. Uh oh.

3 Days Before the Incident

The next day, Jang Mi comes home and sees that Gi Tae’s mom is leaving after dropping by. Gi Tae’s mom tells Jang Mi’s mom that she hopes her request wasn’t too big but Jang Mi’s mom tells her it’s not a problem at all. Jang Mi greets Gi Tae’s mom, who ignores her question and turns to leave. She’s one cold lady. (Aside: does aunt have a job other than driving mom around and stalking Gi Tae?

Jang Mi asks mom why Gi Tae’s mom came for a visit but mom tells her that they’ll talk once they return to their chicken restaurant. Turns out Gi Tae’s mom came by to ask if Jang Mi could help her prepare for Gi Tae’s grandfather’s memorial ceremony. Jang Mi’s response is the best, “Why would I go to another family’s memorial service?” Mom says that it’s so she can earn some points with the family and get some experience dealing with the strict rules of Gi Tae’s family. Jang Mi asks “Are you really my mom? Other moms are so worried that their daughters will be doing all the housework at their husband’s house!” Dad takes Jang Mi’s side (yay!) since he says that she’ll be working hard when she’s married so why should she have to experience it before marriage?

Mom just says that she’s disappointed since dad has made his wife work so hard yet he’s so worried that his daughter has to do a little work. She says don’t worry since it’s better to make jun a few times a year than to make fried chicken every day. Jang Mi can’t take it anymore and confesses that she’s not getting married to Gi Tae. She’s sorry for lying but they are not actually in a relationship. Mom doesn’t believe her and asks her why she can’t get married. Jang Mi yells at mom to believe her but then some drunkards in the restaurant start complaining about the noise.

The drunkards tell Jang Mi to come over and serve them a drink (as if!) and dad says he’ll deal with it. Instead mom just walks over to their table and throws a bunch of fried chicken in their faces. I can see where Jang Mi gets her temper. Mom tells the drunks that if they want to drink with girls then they need to go to an expensive bar. She’s prepared to fight but Jang Mi holds her back and dad apologizes. He asks them to leave and doesn’t charge them for their meal.

Mom gets angry at dad for bowing his head to the drunks. Dad says that it’s his policy but mom just tells him that it’s because he is so weak that Jang Mi has a negative view on marriage. Mom says that Jang Mi shouldn’t have to see scenes like this, that’s why she wanted dad to stop serving alcohol at the restaurant but dad says that she was the one that brought Jang Mi to the restaurant.

Dad says that mom blames him for everything. Mom has had enough and tells dad to sign the divorce papers. She takes out the form but Jang Mi reminds her that she threatened to sign it when Jang Mi got into college as well. Mom says that she put off the divorce since a divorce might ruin Jang Mi’s chances of getting married but since Jang Mi said that she won’t get married, why does she have to put the divorce off now? What is up with parents on this show and blackmailing their kids? Jang Mi gives in and says that she’ll get married.

2 Days Before the Incident

Jang Mi visits Gi Tae at his office and he tells her that she has to help mom prepare for the memorial ceremony. Jang Mi says that it’s his family’s memorial service so why is he acting as if it’s none of his business? Gi Tae says that this is what happens when she goes in and out of his home so freely. Jang Mi reminds him that she was the one that saved him from dying alone but Gi Tae asks if she knows why he almost died in the first place. It was because she broke his bathroom door but Jang Mi asks who was it that hugged her so closely as soon as he saw her. Touché! Gi Tae justs says he doesn’t know who she’s talking about! Ha, these two are adorable!

Jang Mi asks Gi Tae if he developed feelings for her when she saved him and that’s why he wants her to go to the memorial ceremony, since he really wants to marry her. Gi Tae tells her that he’s inviting her to the ceremony so that they won’t get married, especially if mom invited her. Jang Mi doesn’t understand but Gi Tae explains that his mom wants her to get a taste of how difficult it will be to be their daughter-in-law. Without dirtying her own hands, mom will make it so that Jang Mi will give up and walk out on her own. Mom will have upheld the image that she tried to accept an incompetent Joo Jang Mi as a daughter-in-law and will be remembered as the good person. Sneaky, sneaky.

Jang Mi just sighs and tells Gi Tae that they should just confess but he says that they’ve gone too far. There’s no turning back now. Even if they end this lie, it has to be done by his mother. Mom has to be the one to separate them. Jang Mi asks why they have to wait until then but Gi Tae justs tells her that now it has become an issue of his pride and he can’t let mom win so easily. Jang Mi doesn’t see why she has to involve herself in a fight between mother and son but Gi Tae begs her again to throw an ugly tantrum at the memorial. Ahhh so that’s what we saw in the cold open. Jang Mi asks what she needs to do and Gi Tae justs tells her to be herself. Hahaha!

Gi Tae and Jang Mi leaves his office and he tells her that he’s going home early to rest so don’t follow him. She wasn’t planning on it since she also has a date. Gi Tae stops in his tracks to ask who and Yeo Reum shows up and says that it’s with him.

It looks like Jang Mi and Yeo Reum are making good on their promise to be food buddies since they decide to eat cold noodles. Turns out Gi Tae is following behind them in his car and gets a bit jealous, if I dare say so myself, when he sees that Yeo Reum and Jang Mi are getting along real well.

The duo arrives at the cold noodle restaurant but Gi Tae decides to joins them. Jang Mi asks what he’s doing there but he says, “My girl is eating cold noodles with another man. Do I just leave you alone?” He pointedly says that Yeo Reum must not have known that Jang Mi is his girl. Jang Mi just puts her head in her hands and Yeo Reum just laughs amusedly saying that he knew she was Hoon Dong’s girlfriend up until recently and he thought that Gi Tae was Hoon Dong’s friend.

Gi Tae tells Yeo Reum, “I guess you didn’t know that I have no loyalty to friends when it comes to love.” So we’re calling it love now? LOL Yeo Reum says that if that’s the case, Gi Tae will understand him seeing Jang Mi. Ha! Gi Tae asks, super seriously, if Yeo Reum is trying to compete with him and Yeo Reum laughs it off saying how could he possibly compete with Gi Tae; he has more money and he’s muuuuuch older! Hahaha! Jang Mi tries to stifle back a laugh and Gi Tae points out that Yeo Reum has a lot of women but Yeo Reum just says “None like Joo Jang Mi though”. Jang Mi has to tell the two kids to stop it.

The noodles arrive and Gi Tae tries to cut Jang Mi’s noodles for her but she tells him she doesn’t like it that way. Yeo Reum says that they have similar tastes and then the two of them just smile at each other like the dorks they are. Yeo Reum points out that ice cold noodles are the best, mocking the fact that Gi Tae only ordered spicy cold noodles, so Gi Tae just grabs Jang Mi’s bowl while she’s still eating and tells Yeo Reum, “We’re in a relationship where we share a lot together” and takes a sip.

Yeo Reum asks if they have slept together making Gi Tae choke on the soup. Yeo Reum concludes that they probably haven’t  but Gi Tae asks what if they have? I wish! Jang Mi tells them to stop it but Yeo Reum says that it doesn’t matter if they did. Gi Tae and Jang Mi then get into this brief argument (more like her scolding him) where we don’t actually get to hear what’s being said. It’s pretty funny. Gi Tae looks pissed but Yeo Reum continues to eat and smile at him. Ha!

After they eat, Jang Mi drags Gi Tae outside (by the wrists! 10 points to Gryffindor!) and asks what he’s doing. Gi Tae throws the question back at her and asks if she really plans on dating Yeo Reum. She tells him that she’s going slowly just like he suggested but Gi Tae says, “No matter how careful you are, you’re not suited for Han Yeo Reum”. Hmmmm interesting, very interesting. Jang Mi asks why he cares so much but Gi Tae just asks her what will happened if she gets caught hanging out with another guy by his mom. He sure is using mom’s stalking to his advantage! Jang Mi says that it’s almost over between them anyways but Gi Tae tells her to wait until after everything is handled. If she wants to date other men, then she’ll need to cause a scene at his family’s memorial ceremony.

Yeo Reum appears with the check and Jang Mi and Yeo Reum both look at Gi Tae suggesting that he pay it. He heads back inside to pay and Yeo Reum takes the opportunity to take Jang Mi’s hand and they make a break for it. When Gi Tae returns, there’s no one waiting for him. He just sighs and then texts Jang Mi reminding her to not get caught since aunt can be watching from anywhere. Jang Mi gets paranoid and asks Yeo Reum if they can go to a quieter place.

The two head to a park and Jang Mi is on constant look out for aunt. Yeo Reum notices her strange behavior and asks if she’s being stalked but she says that she just gets this feeling that they are being watched! See what Gi Tae’s family did to her?! Yeo Reum jokes that if she’s with him, she’ll have to get used to it since he attracts people’s attention. Ha!

Yeo Reum asks if she’s worried about Gi Tae but she gives a vague response. He asks if they are really dating but she doesn’t know either. Jang Mi sees a car slowly roll up and stop in front of them, without any headlights on. When the lights do turn on, Jang Mi panics, thinking that it must be aunt so she runs away as if she were a fugitive and Yeo Reum has no choice but to follow. She hides behind a tree and uses her hair as a cover and when Yeo Reum asks why she has to hide but she doesn’t really know.

When she decides to stop hiding, she turns around and sees Gi Tae’s dad sitting on a park bench. She freaks out and pushes Yeo Reum onto the other park bench to hide again thinking that dad and mom have followed her all the way there. When the woman’s scarf flies off, dad chases after it and Jang Mi finally sees the lady’s face and realizes that dad’s on a date with another woman. She’s shocked and turns around before dad can see her.

Needing a cover, she holds onto Yeo Reum’s head, all while telling him to BE QUIET, pretending like they are a couple. Yeo Reum sticks his lips out and Jang Mi justs smacks them, not in the mood to play with him. Ha!

She turns back around and sees dad affectionately kissing the strange lady’s forehead. It dawns on Jang Mi that dad is having an affair. Yeo Reum asks who that is but Jang Mi is still shocked and apologizes for leaving first. Yeo Reum offers to take her home but she declines.

Yeo Reum leaves and gets into Se Ah’s car, and by the looks of her car, she was the one that shined the headlights on the couple earlier. Has she been stalking Jang Mi as well? Se Ah points out that it looks like Yeo Reum and Jang Mi are pretty close and asks what kind of relationship they have. Yeo Reum is more attracted by the fact that it seems like everyone in interested in Jang Mi. Right?!? Se Ah says she’ll get to the point and confesses that the person she cares about is Gi Tae.

Se Ah tells Yeo Reum that Gi Tae and Jang Mi have already met each other’s families. Yeo Reum thinks that’s impossible and so does Se Ah since Gi Tae is never that serious. It’s true guys. I saw it happen. Yeo Reum actually says that he thinks Gi Tae is being sincere; it’s Jang Mi who’s ignoring him.

Se Ah asks if Yeo Reum wants to find out her true feelings but he asks why he should do such a thing. Se Ah just says that he’s already in the process of getting to know Jang Mi anyways and then offers him an envelope of money. Ooooooooh. He readily accepts and says that he can eat delicious things with Jang Mi.

Jang Mi sits on the bus in a daze thinking back to what she saw in the park. Her first concern is how Gi Tae will deal with this knowledge! Awwwwww.

Gi Tae’s in his apartment and checks to make sure his bathroom door is all fixed. Yeah, don’t want to get locked in there again. He talks to himself and asks, “Why Han Yeo Reum of all people? She has no taste in men.” Haha.

1 Day Before the Incident

Jang Mi is at work struggling over whether or not she should tell Gi Tae about dad. Hyun Hee asks her what’s wrong and when Jang Mi says that it’s nothing, Hyun Hee tells Jang Mi that she’s a bit upset since they used to talk about everything. Look who’s talking! Hyun Hee asks if it’s about Hoon Dong Oppa and says that as expected, friendship among women isn’t strong. Jang Mi says that’s not the reason and Hyun Hee tells Jang Mi that she did it for her sake. Suuuuuuuure. Jang Mi says, sarcastically, that she knows. Hyun Hee says that she’s serious and to ask Hoon Dong Oppa herself.

Just then, Hoon Dong appears, dressed all fancy, holding a bouquet of flowers behind his back. Hyun Hee tells them to have a chat, all while standing there, but Jang Mi is not sure what Hyun Hee is trying to do. Hyun Hee suggests that the heartache caused by Hoon Dong was so great that Jang Mi has been going around from one guy to the next, and that she’s worried Jang Mi will get hurt. Hell nah!

Hoon Dong tells Jang Mi that it’s okay to tell him her sincerity. Haha this guy sure is persistent. Jang Mi asks why she would do such a thing causing poor Hoon Dong to become flustered, looking towards Hyun Hee for assistance. He gets down one knee and presents her with the bouquet and says that he’s sincere. Jang Mi says that among Gi Tae, Yeo Reum and him, there is one that isn’t for her, HIM. Hyun Hee smirks to herself but Hoon Dong just can’t believe it, telling her to stop playing push and pull. Jang Mi asks if he needs her to tell him again but he rejects her offer.

Just then, Jang Mi looks away, exasperated, and sees Gi Tae’s mom. She panics and pulls Hoon Dong away, and hides him in a dressing room. She approaches, mom acting all surpised that she’s there. Mom apologizes for coming unannounced. She sure does do that often for being soooooo sorry about it each and every time! Mom tells Jang Mi that she came to the department store to buy some meat and fruit for the memorial and asks if Jang Mi can accompany her right now. She’s at work but when she sees Hoon Dong leaving the dressing room, she quickly agrees to get mom out of there. Hoon Dong also recognizes mom.

Jang Mi goes shopping with mom and thinks back to dad’s affair. Mom asks her if she’s ever peeled chestnuts before and Jang Mi says only roasted chestnuts. Mom wonders if that means her family doesn’t hold a memorial ceremony and Jang Mi replies in the affirmative. She says that when she was younger, she saw the ceremony get set up but it was the men who peeled the chestnuts. I like her family.

Mom: “Our family’s kitchen is a space for women only.”

Jang Mi: “When it gets tough, people should help each other. There’s no need to distinguish between men and women.” (Hell yeah!!!!!)

Mom: “It’s not difficult. It’s rather a joy.”

Jang Mi: “Huh?”

Mom: “If I take on more work and try harder, my loved ones will have a comfortable time and enjoy good food. That’s a right and joy that only women get to have. Why share that with men?” (Suuuuuuuuuure. Who doesn’t love dinner with a side of sexism?)

Jang Mi looks at mom with pity until she notices that Hoon Dong followed them, still carrying his bouquet. Mom follows her gaze and notices Hoon Dong. She approaches him but by the time she gets to where he was, she just see a supermarket sample lady with a bouquet of flowers! Ha.

Jang Mi is more of a luggage girl than a shopping companion and she ends up carrying all of the groceries out to mom’s car. Mom thanks her (oh the sincerity) and says that it would be nice to have some tea but she’s busy with a lot of work left to do at home. She starts listing the things that still needs to be done and ends by saying that she even has to stay up all night and peel the chestnuts. Jang Mi gets the hint and offers to help peel the chestnuts. Mom is happy to get those off of her hands and gives Jang Mi a ginormous bag of chestnuts. Someone’s going to be staying up late. Mom says that Jang Mi will show up early tomorrow, right? Aunt even gives Jang Mi her empty cup for her to throw away.

Jang Mi returns back to work and gets scolded by her boss for leaving during work hours. Jang Mi apologizes but requests for a day off tomorrow! Ha! Her boss tells her that if she’s going to get married and quit, she should tell her in advance. Apparently Hyun Hee told the boss that Jang Mi’s future mother-in-law came by. Yep, we got a backstabber on our hands. Hyun Hee tries to act innocent and she tells Jang Mi that she heard from Hoon Dong that the lady that came by is the plastic surgeon’s mom.

Boss tells Jang Mi that if she becomes the wife of a doctor, she must remember to stop by their store often. Jang Mi tells her that’s not the case but boss says that Jang Mi’s already going around looking at wedding gifts. She’s talking about the thing that Jang Mi’s been hiding behind her back and tells Jang Mi to turn around so that she can see what it is. It’s the back of chestnuts and both Hyun Hee and the boss are shocked. Boss leaves and tells them that they’ll be working over time tonight. Jang Mi glares at Hyun Hee who apologizes.

Jang Mi leaves work carrying the huge bag of chestnuts. Even the store guards look at her funny.

Gi Tae’s chilling at home, reading a book when he hears the familiar sound of the door opening. He goes to check and it’s Jang Mi and her bag o’chestnuts! Smart girl! Don’t be peeling all those by yourself! Jang Mi’s surprised that Gi Tae hasn’t changed his pass code. Gi Tae asks if Jang Mi doesn’t know how to ring a doorbell but she asks if he would have opened the door for her if she did. He asks why she came if she knew he wouldn’t open it for her but Jang Mi reminds him that he should be grateful that she’s checking up on him. What happens if he slips and falls in the bathroom again? He’s never going to live that down is he?

Gi Tae asks why she came and she drops the bag o’chestnuts on the table. She tells him that this is her homework from his mom and says, ever so adorably, that they should peel them together. Gi Tae can’t believe that she agreed to do this because his mom said so since he’s certain that she just fell into his mom’s trap. He’s all fired up about how it has all started but Jang Mi just ignores him and grabs the knives. He tells her to do it alone but she says that this is for his grandpa. He asks “Who told you to butt into my family’s memorial ceremony and tell me what to do with the chestnuts?” Ummm I believe that was you sir.

Jang Mi starts sharpening the knives and threatens if she should tell everyone that they’ve been putting on a show. Gi Tae meekly looks away and next thing you know, the two of them are on the floor, peeling chestnuts together! So cute! He does a crappy job and she makes him do it again. He doesn’t understand why she’s putting so much work into this when he told her to make a scene. Jang Mi says that she just feels sorry, the more she knows. Jang Mi sees that mom cares for his family a lot and tries hard but his family takes it for granted. Gi Tae says that’s because Jang Mi hasn’t had to live with her but Jang Mi says he doesn’t know because he’s lived with her.

She starts stammering and tells him that she’s going to say something and he will get hurt after hearing it but she thinks he needs to know before it’s too late. She continues to say that if he needs to talk to someone about it, he can talk to her since she’s been through a similar situation. She’s always been stuck in the middle of her parent’s fights. Gi Tae has no idea what she’s talking about until Jang Mi says that his father has another woman.

Gi Tae: “Shut up. What do you know that you are blabbering?”

Jang Mi: “It’s because I saw something.”

Gi Tae: “Stop taking interest.”

Jang Mi: “Did you by chance already know? (Gi Tae gets up) Then why did you stay still!? Is it something that will be fixed if you ignore and cover it up? You have to take care of it before your mother finds out! If you’re in an awkward position to take action, I’ll met your father and put an end…”

Gi Tae: “What are you?”

Jang Mi: “What else am I. I am…”

Gi Tae: “Don’t butt into our family business. (Kicks the chestnuts over) Do you think you’re really a part of our family just because you’re peeling these chestnuts?”

Jang Mi: “Hey! I thought for you..”

Gi Tae: “Who told you to think about me? You and I won’t be tangled in this mess anymore after tomorrow. Did you forget?”

Jang Mi: “Alright, I get it. I’m so sorry that I forgot my place and got involved in your great family’s business.”

I know he’s lashing out because he’s hurt but still. Those are some harsh words.

After storming out, she calls Gi Tae a bastard and a stupid jerk even though she was worried for him. Slowly her anger turns to worry and she calls him a stupid jerk, but this time with a much gentler tone. She says she only had concerns for him in her heart. Once inside the elevator, she does a 180 and changes tone saying that she also hates getting involved with Gi Tae and that she’ll annoy him so much tomorrow that their relationship will end for sure.

Day of the Incident

Mom tries to wake Jang Mi up and begins looking for a nice outfit for today’s ceremony. Jang Mi tells mom that she chose her outfit last night and when mom asks which one, she says that she’s already wearing it. She’s basically wearing an apron. LOL Jang Mi leaves and mom asks how can she go looking like she just woke up. Jang Mi has a good point when she says that she will be sitting down all day making pancakes anyways so a comfortable outfit is best. Dad’s still shocked that his wife is actually sending Jang Mi to Gi Tae’s house to do work and he looks after her worriedly. Love him!

Jang Mi arrives at Gi Tae’s house and greets mom who just looks Jang Mi up and down at a lost for words. Jang Mi asks about the guests but mom says that they’ll arrive in time for dinner and aunt and grandma left to get massages. Jang Mi follows behind mom into the kitchen and is shocked at the amount of work left to do. Mom asks Jang Mi about the chestnuts and she says that Gi Tae will bring them since they peeled them together last night. Mom’s upset that Jang Mi would ask her son, a plastic surgeon who works soooooo hard, to peel chestnuts. Jang Mi says that she had to work overtime yesterday too. Mom continues to say that Gi Tae depends on his hands for careful surgeries so what would she do if he injured his hand? Jang Mi apologizes for not thinking that far but she laughs and says that Gi Tae really didn’t know how to peel the chestnuts anyways. She doesn’t know how he manages to cut chins with those hands. Ha!

Mom is not amused and says that it’s her fault for asking for a favor from her. She tells Jang Mi to go sit down since she’s used to doing everything alone but Jang Mi slowly takes the gloves off of mom’s hand and offers to do it.

At the spa, aunt thinks that Jang Mi is going to create a huge mess but grandma knows that’s what mom is hoping would happen.

Jang Mi is settled outside on the lawn with multiple pans on. She’s working so hard frying everything in the hot sun that she’s in a daze and is sweating like crazy (she even fans her armpits). She suddenly stops and asks why she’s working so hard. I’m asking the same question! She decides to call Gi Tae to ask where he is, just as he’s asking Yeo Reum for a grape-lemonade. Jang Mi can’t believe that while she’s working her ass off for his family’s memorial, he’s relaxing. She angrily asks if it’s refreshing but he just tells her to half-ass everything. She can burn everything or mix them all together for porridge but she says that she can’t play around with food like that. Good girl!

She tells him to come but he can’t until his surgeries are over. She’s pissed that he gets to use work as an excuse when she had to turn in a day’s leave of absence, “marriage is unbelievably unfair, huh?” Gi Tae reminds her that they’re not getting married for realz so why is it unfair? Jang Mi yells back that if it were a real marriage, she’d rather not do it. Gi Tae reminds her to keep her voice down since mom might be listening. Anyway, she begs him to come quickly and bring the chestnuts before hanging up.

Yeo Reum brings Gi Tae his drink and as he’s about to leave, Hoon Dong appears in front of him. Hoon Dong takes off his sunglasses and says coolly; “Don’t hurt her”. Gi Tae, “Alright”. Hoon Dong loses his cool demeanor and asks if Gi Tae doesn’t feel sorry even when he says it like that and reminds Gi Tae that he was first and since they’re friends, Gi Tae should back down. Gi Tae basically says that his hands are tied since his mom likes Jang Mi and that Jang Mi is even helping to prepare his grandpa’s memorial ceremony. Yeo Reum ears perk up at the news. Hoon Dong doesn’t believe it since Gi Tae hates people and asks if Gi Tae is planning on getting married. Gi Tae doesn’t answer and leaves behind a fuming Hoon Dong.

Jang Mi finishes cooking everything and gets up to do a celebratory stretch when grandma and all of the other aunts catch her in a very compromising position. One of the aunts asked if the family hired a maid this year but aunt-aunt says that she’s Gi Tae’s girlfriend. All of the aunts are shocked but grandma shoos them inside. Grandma holds Jang Mi’s hands and says that it must be hard, but Jang Mi thinks it will be easier now with all of the other aunts here. Grandma gives her this look that suggest that probably aint gonna happen.

In the house, while mom and Jang Mi are working in the kitchen, grandma and the aunts are enjoying themselves in the living room. They continually demand that mom get them this and that and Jang Mi finds the whole situation ridiculously unfair.

Yeo Reum calls her about a good restaurant he found. She apologizes and tells him that she’ll call him later but he lays on the guilt, saying that she even left early the other day. Jang Mi explains that she’s busy and he asks where she is. Jang Mi lies and says she’s working when aunt comes to the kitchen asking for some fruits. Jang Mi calls aunt by customer, which makes aunt wonder who Jang Mi is talking to. She decides to listen into the conversation. Jang Mi tells Yeo Reum that she’ll be late but he tells her that he will wait so come to the restaurant. Aunt hears about the restaurant before Gi Tae shows up and sees aunt eavesdropping so he calls Jang Mi’s name super loudly, causing her to drop her phone in the sink.

Gi Tae tells Jang Mi to be more careful since there are lots of eyes watching and ears listening. Jang Mi’s sad that her phone is dead but Gi Tae tells her that she’s used that old phone for long enough. Jang Mi gets upset and says, “Yeah to someone like you who only uses people it may be it after you use it once but to me it’s a precious thing.” Gi Tae gestures for her to be quiet and then Jang Mi asks if he brought the chestnuts. He proudly shows her the bag. Awwww did he stay up late peeling the rest?

Gi Tae reminds her about why she’s there and wonders why she’s working so hard in the kitchen. Jang Mi’s not too sure herself.

The memorial ceremony takes place and when Jang Mi sees dad, she can’t forget about what she saw at the park. Everyone sits down for dinner and Jang Mi is in a slump. Gi Tae tells her to make a scene but she just throws her spoon in anger. Dad tells Jang Mi that she must have worked hard making the pancakes and she says yes. Ha!

Gi Tae says that Jang Mi must not be feeling too well after smelling oil all day and tells his dad to give Jang Mi some alcohol. He knows her weakness. Everyone’s surprised but Jang Mi gladly accepts while staring at Gi Tae but he’ gives her the “what did I do” look all while smiling to himself.

Jang Mi asks for a 2nd and 3rd glass and Gi Tae is delighted. Mom’s not pleased. Now with some alcohol running through her body, Jang Mi finds the courage to point out everything that is wrong with this family. She says that it was hard on her and asks if everybody was being a bit too much. Gi Tae just sits to the side and continues eating while happily waiting for the scene to unfold. Jang Mi attacks Gi Tae first by saying, “the high and mighty third generation son appeared sluggishly when it was near dinner time”, but he cutely responds with, “I peeled the chestnuts”.

Jang Mi then says that aunt received a massage when someone else should’ve gotten one, looking towards mom. Aunt says that she was bathing. She then points out the fact that all the other aunts just sat around and talked amongst each other. They can’t believe she’s complaining when all they did was talk after not seeing each other for a long time. Jang Mi says that she and mom don’t share the same bloodline yet they were working hard. She even tells grandma that she’s disappointed in her since she thought grandma was a good person but she just pretended to not know anything.

Lastly, she says that the worst is father-in-law. Gi Tae doesn’t look so relaxed now. Jang Mi says that mother-in-law works hard for the family and for him, but what does he do? Dad thinks she’s still talking about the memorial and says that he was in another city but she’s asking about what he did outside of the house. Dad acts like he doesn’t understand what she’s talking about and Jang Mi says,

“Because I went through it all, I know. If there is a dent in a parents’ relationship, the child’s heart gets really big scars.”

The aunts have no idea what she’s talking about. Jang Mi continues to say that she saw everything and realizing where this is headed, mom stops her and asks to see her for a moment. The aunts asks dad if they are having marital issues but he says that there was never a problem. Gi Tae just glares at dad. The aunts ask if he knows anything and he lies saying that Jang Mi was just talking about her own parents since their relationship isn’t very good. He gets up to follow Jang Mi and mom.

Mom lectures Jang Mi, asking how she could have done what she just did, even if she’s never had experience dealing with such matters before. Jang Mi tells her that it’s because she pities mom too much and was trying to help. Mom asks if she looks like the type of person who needs sympathy but Jang Mi insists that’s just because she doesn’t know the truth. Mom says that she’s not a fool and that she’s in control of everything that happens in her house. Okay mom, be in denial.

Jang Mi insists that mom doesn’t know the full length of it and asks that if she knew, why is she living like this. Is she stupid or something? Mom gives Jang Mi a slap just as Gi Tae appears in the background. Oooh no you didn’t!! Mom tells her to shut up and watch what she says. Whatever Jang Mi knows, she better not let it slip. Jang Mi is shocked to realize that mom also knows. Mom basically says the same thing that Gi Tae said earlier, “Just because you made some jun, do you think you can interfere in our house’s matters recklessly?” Jang Mi retorts that she mistakenly thought that she became a member of the family since mom kept using her like she was. Jang Mi realizes that she has duties as part of the family but no rights. She continues to say that she can’t live like mom, since no matter what; she can’t live faking sincerity and not being able to say that something is wrong.

Jang Mi storms off and runs into Gi Tae who has witnessed the whole exchange. She looks a bit disappointed in him. In the living room, Jang Mi listens as the aunts talk about her and how if her parents are uneasy, they pass it down to their kids. By now Gi Tae is also standing right behind her and looks over at her worriedly. When they find out that mom and dad own a bar, they say that her ability to drink alcohol like that in front of adults run in her blood then. They say that Gi Tae was raised with love under ideal parents (ha! As if!) so would Jang Mi be able to sustain a proper marriage after witnessing her parents fighting all the time as she grew up? They say that you have to have had received love to give it properly. Birches please!

Jang Mi turns to Gi Tae with tears in her eyes and asks if he told them about her parents. He looks down guiltily and she takes that as a yes. She asks him if she wasn’t enough that he has to bring her parents in to get bashed by his relatives. He tries to say something but she’s angry and says that he’s using someone’s scars. She calls him a bastard and starts attacking him. All the aunts try to stop her. She even grabs a dried fish and starts hitting him with it until he lands on the ceremonial table.

Mom appears and asks what she’s doing but Jang Mi just approaches Gi Tae and asks, “Now it is okay right? I think I’ve done all that I was assigned to do so I’ll be leaving now.”

Gi Tae looks apologetic and he chases after her wanting to at least take her home. She tells him that since they decided to end it, she did just that, so what else does he want from her? He calls after her but she storms out.

Back in the house, all the aunts ask mom how she can accepts someone like Jang Mi into the family even if she’s in a hurry to get Gi Tae married off. They say that if she were going to let him marry that kind of girl, it’s better that he lives alone. Gi Tae can’t take anymore of their ridiculousness.

“Please stop it! If it isn’t Joo Jang Mi, I won’t get married. If you oppose, I will live alone forever. So just know that.”

Omo, is that your real feelings or your rebelliousness talking?

Mom tries to say something but Gi Tae just glares at her. Gi Tae starts cleaning up the table and the aunts asks if grandma is just going to stay still after what just happened. Grandma thinks back on Jang Mi’s words and she just laughs saying that her husband had this coming after flipping over tables when he was alive.

In the taxi, Jang Mi thinks about Yeo Reum’s offer and how he said that he would wait for her at the restaurant. She heads to Hoon Dong’s restaurant but the door’s locked. She starts to walk away until Yeo Reum appears and calls out her name. She’s surprised that he waited for her even though her phone wasn’t even working but he say it’s because he promised. Awwww, it would be sweet if I didn’t know that you had ulterior motives.

Aunt tells mom that Jang Mi is meeting someone at a restaurant and, thinking fast, mom takes out her phone to call Hoon Dong’s mom. She asks if Hoon Dong was seeing someone recently and hears that there was a stalker. Hoon Dong’s mom doesn’t remember her name but since she did see her face mom asks to meet and talk tomorrow.

Yeo Reum takes Jang Mi to the kitchen and makes her some pasta as she downs some wine straight from the bottle. What’s new? She tries his food and clearly enjoys it, which puts a huge smile on his face. Yeo Reum asks if she’s having a hard time because of Gi Tae. She asks how he knows and he just asks if she wants to get married that badly. Jang Mi continues to down the wine and says

Jang Mi: “It wasn’t for marriage. My goal was to make a scene, but without me knowing, it became sincerity.”

Yeo Reum: “Sincerity?”

Jang Mi: “But my sincerity was a big scene. The worst of its kind.”

Yeo Reum: “Are you saying that your feeling toward Gi Tae became sincere?

Jang Mi: “No, I am not in that kind of relationship with Gong Gi Tae.”

Yeo Reum: “No?”

Jang Mi: “Truthfully, I’m very, very, very, very, very, very worried about Gong Gi Tae.” (awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww then she falls asleep and hits her head on the table)

Yeo Reum says that he’s more worried about her. Aw.

Gi Tae is in his bed, thinking back to the moment when Jang Mi got slapped by mom and when she met eyes with him.

The next morning, mom heads out to meet with Hoon Dong’s mom. Thankfully, aunt is also a mole so she calls Gi Tae to inform him about what’s happening.

At the same restaurant, Jang Mi and Yeo Reum are both asleep, with Jang Mi making some kissy faces. What are you dreaming about? Gi Tae tries calling Jang Mi but remembers that her phone broke. The restaurant door opens. Uh oh. Gi Tae races mom to get to the restaurant first.


It’s one step forward and one step back for Gi Tae. Just when I thought that he was finally moving in the right direction with regards to Jang Mi, he had to go ahead and ruin it again! This push and pull is stressing me out!

It’s so sad to know that Gi Tae’s mom chooses to stay in a loveless marriage and that Gi Tae grew up in that sort of environment. In public, mom and dad obviously pretend like they have the ideal marriage but they don’t realize how toxic this superficial relationship has affected their son’s (in)ability to form romantic bonds. Why would he when he grew up witnessing his mom’s unhappiness and his dad’s constant infidelity? He’s aware of how broken his parent’s marriage is but he’s too afraid to say anything about it and prefers to ignore the fact that there’s even a problem. Keeping everything inside is never healthy but he’s found a companion in Jang Mi who will be there to listen when he does decide to talk about it.

Also, poor Jang Mi! She told Gi Tae and mom about what she knew out of concern but what she got in return was anger. They just weren’t ready to face reality, though I felt like Gi Tae was a bit relieved that someone finally said something. I understand that all families have skeletons that they want to hide but I just felt so bad for Jang Mi since her heart was definitely in the right place. Also, how can you not love Jang Mi. She shows that a heroine can be sweet and not have to be stupid. She stands up for herself and does what she thinks is right.

A part of me feels bad for Gi Tae’s mom but another part of me finds her unbearable, she’s too manipulative and cold. So passive aggressive! I wonder if she’s always been that way or if her husband’s constant betrayal made her into the woman that she is today. She needs to loosen up, be happy and become her own woman and Jang Mi might just be what she needs to get there. Otherwise, she’s just slowly distancing herself from everyone in the family, since it’s obvious most people find her too domineering.

What exactly is the relationship between Se Ah and Yeo Reum. I know in episode 2, Se Ah also paid for Yeo Reum’s party suit but I didn’t think much of it. Now I’m wondering if he’s a gigolo or something. He obviously does things for Se Ah, with regards to other girls, for money. Maybe that’s why Gi Tae was so against Jang Mi liking Yeo Reum. He was trying to protect her from what he knows is an unreliable guy? Or he’s just jealous. Probably both?

But it’s true what they say, fathers and daughters, mothers and sons. We’ve seen that Gi Tae’s mom is overly protective of Gi Tae (in her own way) but now we see that Jang Mi’s dad is very similar. He doesn’t want his daughter to have to go to another person’s house to do labor, even if it’s for the potential in-laws! This is what’s so great about the show! All the characters have a certain depth to them and they are all endearing and likable in their own way. Hyun Hee is slightly manipulative but at least she doesn’t really try to hide it. She does seem to value Jang Mi’s friendship, but she also won’t back down when it comes to the guy she likes. It’s also nice that Jang Mi is well aware of everything that Hyun Hee is doing and they are more like frenemies now. Then there’s Se Ah who’s been pretty honest (well, if you don’t include the who bribing Yeo Reum thing). I really liked that she did in fact tell Gi Tae that it was thanks to Jang Mi’s concern that she even stopped by his apartment. And of course, who could forget Gi Tae and Hoon Dong’s awesome bromance! The two of them are so adorable together even though they are kind of fighting over the same girl. There’s a good-natured-ness about their bickering interactions and above it all, I can see that they are still friends.


4 thoughts on “Marriage, Not Dating Episode 4 Recap

  1. Spiritedaway13 says:

    I love this drama sooo much. I keep wondering which feelings are real and which aren’t.

    I am also quite curious about yeo reum and se ah’s relationship. How do they know each other? Did they themselves have a fling of some kind? It’s all really perplexing

    I also can’t stand her frienemy or hoong dong.

    I guess my fave is definitely jang mi. She wears her heart on her sleeve and is still so complex. I am eager to know more about those flashbacks she had. Gi tae is so sad. I just feel for the guy bc he’s had such a bad upbringing and this his views on marriage are negative. I think he needs someone like jang mi who he feels comfortable with and can shAre his years of bottled up feelings.


    • dramapenchant says:

      Isn’t it just soooo good?!?

      At this stage, it’s definitely a bit hard to read everyone’s true feelings but it’s obvious that Gi Tae and Jang Mi are affecting each other a lot more than they know. They fight like cats-and-dogs but when it comes down to it, they both care for each other a lot.

      I actually like all of the characters at this stage. A lot of it probably has to do with how well each of them are portrayed. Props to the cast. Though of course my favorite is Jang Mi, our adorable alcoholic.


  2. jomo143 says:

    Thanks for the recap! I really enjoyed this episode and have replayed the JM-GT scenes to look for clues about his feelings.

    JM is the nomu nomu nomu nomu nomu best female character in a drama for a very long time. I cheered with she pick up GT on her back, too!

    He may be a tiny bit jealous of YR, I agree, but mostly I think he is competitive with him – over everything. He doesn’t want to lose anything to him. Remember when he tried to win in the dance off at the auction?

    I thought YR was a secret rich kid? I read that somewhere. He doesn’t really need the money from SR, but enjoys playing her.

    Another reason I love this show: Yun Woo Jin’s delivery of his lines are almost always in a whisper. I don’t know if that is how he talks in real life, but it is very unique and sexy. His scenes with JM, how well he knows her already, how much he cares, really, without him realizing it. I love he can say pretty much anything he wants to her and she takes it without being insulted.
    This is my fav show this season. With this cast – none of them are annoying – the OST and the excellent writing so far, it’ll only get better!


    • dramapenchant says:

      I agree! She’s simply the best! I always laugh so hard watching her scenes! This is my first time watching Han Groo, but I have to say that she is a natural! (Just realized I’ve watched her before in Girl K…)

      I think GT is definitely competitive but I have to argue that he’s more jealous of YR with regards to JM than anything. We don’t see him act that way when YR is around SA. Also, I interpreted his dancing at the auction not as a “I have to beat YR” thing but because he didn’t want to go to the ajumma that bid $1,000. If he danced, then he might get saved from that lady, since she looked like she wanted to eat him alive. LOL

      I really hope he’s just playing with SA because I’m slowly losing my respect for him.

      OMG I love YWJ’s voice and his delivery as well! Great comic timing and I agree, his whispers are nomu nomu nomu sexy! And when he walks, he has this swagger that I find adorable!

      The two of them are so adorable together! It’s obvious that they care for each other and they really do know each other best. They’re in a relationship where they honestly talk to each other about everything and although they argue a lot, they always return to each other.

      Definitely my favorite show this season as well!


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